Offog: One

7 weeks ago by @jtsteam

Offog: One

jtsteam

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Liner Notes

This is a much abridged retelling in #ukulele #folk #filk of Eric Frank Russell's Hugo Award winning short story "Allamagoosa". If you don't know the story, this contains spoilers, but you'll probably also see what's coming a mile off anyway, like any good shaggy dog story...

I just thought it'd be fun to try to retell it in song :).

Lyrics

[D][Bm]
[G][Bm][D][A][D]

We were [D]taking the inventory, while [Bm]waiting at the dock
[D]Ticking off the entries to the [G]ticking of the [A]clock
[G]Everything was [D]present, we could [G]soon be moving [D]on
Till we [G]came up to the [Bm]entry reading "[D]Off[A]og: [D]One"

Has [D]anybody seen it, have we [Bm]got one any more?
And can [D]anybody tell me what an [G]offog might be [A]for?
We'd [G]better find the [D]offog and we'd [G]better find it [D]fast
The [G]auditor is [Bm]coming and you [D]know he's [A]going to [D]ask

The [G]offog was [D]signed for when we [A]all checked [Bm]in
And [G]no-one's sold an [D]offog or [A]thrown one in the bin
I [G]don't know what an [D]offog is, I [F#7]haven't got a [Bm]clue
But we'd [Bm]better have an [G]offog when the [D]audi[A]tor is [D]due

Well it [D]should be in the galley, listed [Bm]with the pots and pans
In the [D]cupboard with the rations, is it [G]there behind the [A]cans?
We could [G]simplify the [D]task and we could [G]get on with our [D]jobs
If a [G]member of the [Bm]crew could tell us [D]what an [A]offog [D]was

We've ac[D]counted for the radios, the [Bm]navigation aids
[D]Speakers and transceivers, every [G]light on each dis[A]play
We've [G]even got the [D]harness and the [G]collar for the [D]pet
But the [G]offog is the [Bm]only thing we [D]haven't [A]crossed off [D]yet

How [G]did we do with[D]out it, how [A]was the offog [Bm]missed?
We've [G]got to have an [D]offog cause I [A]see it on the list
I [G]don't know where to [D]buy one, I don't [F#7]see it in [Bm]supplies
But we'd [Bm]better have an [G]offog when the [D]audi[A]tor ar[D]rives

So [D]someone volunteered, or at [Bm]least was voluntold
To [D]come up with an offog that would [G]bring us up to [A]code
And our [G]canine mascot [D]Peaslake was [G]barking with [D]pride
When the [G]offog was in[Bm]stalled, and the [D]audit [A]satis[D]fied

[D][Bm]
[D][G][A]
[G][D][G][D]
[G][Bm][D][A][D]

Yes we [G]conjured up an [D]offog, and we [A]got away with [Bm]that
And the [G]technobabble [D]might have fooled at [A]least one bureaucrat
But we're [G]going to get found [D]out one day, so [F#7]better tell H[Bm]Q
That we [Bm]need another [G]offog 'cause the [D]one we've [A]got just [D]blew

Well they [D]sent an urgent message, de[Bm]manded we explain
If [D]this could happen once, it could [G]happen once a[A]gain
We [G]hadn't seen the [D]typo, mis[G]understood the [D]log
Now we [G]have to say what [Bm]happened to our [D]ship's of[A]ficial [Dm]dog

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