Progress Bar

by @jtsteam

Liner Notes

This song is very silly. It has gone from idea to posting in... well, you can probably tell it wasn't very long. I'm posting it now because if I leave it any longer, I'll decide it's too silly.

With apologies to people who have to implement this sort of feature. I know it's tricky, honestly...

#filk #nerd_folk #silly #ukulele #fuc

(I should add, by the way, that I did try to get the "1 minute 48" one close to correct, and I think I managed πŸ˜„)

Lyrics

It'll take some time to sing you this song
And you probably want to know how long
So to help you know where we are
I've equipped it with a progress bar

There's two minutes left
There's two minutes left
There's five minutes left
There's one minute 48 left

I enlisted the help of some pros
The team who built the progress bar for Chrome
It's sure to estimate it right
So you know you won't be here all night

There's one minute 57 left
There's three minutes left
There's one hour left
Stalled

There's three days left
There's just a few seconds left
There's one minute left
Done



Hehehehehe...so true. A most enjoyable take on the subject, with great uke picking too. I'm sure this would go down a storm if you played it live!

So good, and not funny when it really happens to you when on hold. Recently, while on hold for approximately 30 minutes, the timer counting was fluctuating by hours up and down. Actual time on hold finished at 2 1/2 hours. I can certainly relate.

@beacon

Brilliant! You got the timing right at the right places and you perfectly capture the feeling of waiting for downloads.

@jorh

Fantastic idea for a song - not seen anything like it before, and love the idea! Especially love the second verse, great humour. Nice idea to repeat the melody for how long is left as well, like it’s on a loop when it switch between minutes, days, hours.

Great idea. Fantastic execution. Beautiful uke playing. Nerd.

Lots of fun and recognizable by anyone who has spent any time in front of a desktop computer.

🟦🟦🟦🟦🟦🟦🟦🟦🟦🟦 100% Done!
Stephen's comment below is brilliant! "It could also serve as a metaphor for our short and finite lives - we don't know how much time we have left". If you'd like to move this out of the #silly niche, this would be a perfect way to do so. Imagine a bridge between chorus 2 and 3 that describes the similarity between this song's progress bar and the listener's lifespan. The whole thing suddenly gains philosophical depth, and the "Done" in the end gives it a whole new direction.

πŸŸ¦πŸŸ¦πŸŸ¦πŸŸ¦πŸŸ¦πŸŸ¦β—»οΈβ—»οΈβ—»οΈβ—»οΈ 60%
Comment uploading. A little patience please. Do NOT turn off your machine during this process.

This is my favourite bit of self-demonstrating art since that Tom Scott video that constantly refreshes its title to show the current number of views. I hope it gets but a fraction of that attention.

Power to you for working out the timing here; I know I wouldn't have the patience. The erratic timings reminded me of my early dialup days, when the shareware WAD I was downloading would either be a week or 17 seconds away depending on factors clearly beyond my comprehension.

It could also serve as a metaphor for our short and finite lives - we don't know how much time we have left, or what might come along to suddenly abridge or prolong it. So make the most of it, I suppose.

Clever idea, charming singing, and sharp uke plucking. Good one!