Biff the Rescue Dog

by @berni1954

Liner Notes

This one is for Super Skirmish (L)

It's a tale of canine chaos, also inspired by one of the titles on the Lolita Prints Challenge #lolitaprompt


INTRO (D) (G) (D)(G)

(G) My cousin Jill's a caninophile
(C) Boy, does she love her (G) dog
Biff was rescued from the pound
Looking (D) more like a warthog
She (F) cleaned him up and trained him
But that (C) pooch is still an earth(G)quake
Don't let him even catch the smell
Of (D) any tasty (G) cake

He'd (G) ruined Nana's birthday special
By (C) gobbling down the (G) lot
He'd even eaten the candles
The (D) silly sweet-toothed clot
He looked (F) suitably remorseful
Be(C)hind the kitchen (G) door
With the ruins of that work of art
(D) Spread all over the (G) floor

(G) Jill had planned her wedding
With a (C) cake of several (G) tiers
And locked it in the spare room
A(D)long with all the beers
But fi(F)ancé Jack was nervous
And (C) fancied one bottle (G) more
But after cracking the top off
He for(D)got to lock the (G) door

The (G) ceremony went quite well
The (C) mothers all shed (G) tears
The priest was Father Mathew
Who the (D) family'd known for years
But when they (F) got to the reception
The (C) mood changed very (G) quick
Biff had devoured the wedding cake
E(D)nough to make him (G) sick

(G) He sat among the remnants
(C) Looking all shame(G)faced
Of the little figures on the top
There was (D) not even a trace
(F) Biff was lying sideways
Making a (C) whimpering (G) sound
If she hadn't loved that dog so much
He'd have (D) been sent back to the (G) pound


Great humour throughout, luckily although we own 2 dogs, neither are this naughty. Love the story.


Great story. I couldn't help but smile all the way through. And I liked your story-telling delivery.


This is a hoot, a well-told & funny story. We have a dog that can be a bit chaotic as well so that made it even better. Nice playing & singing. Great skirmish!


Wonderful story. I laughed a lot. Old Biff was quite the troublemaker. The style of the music fits the lyric. It's that English folk ballad thing. Lot of words for a skirmish. Good job.


Dogs are often like babies only a mother could love them! Sounds a bit like a Mad Hairy McClary story by lynly dodd. Nice one